the truth:  You're not special.

You're not, no one is.  I, certainly, am not special.  This should be a given.  This should be something everyone realizes.  "Entitlement" is a presupposed condition given to you by the debts held by others in your favor.  This indebtedness (if that's a word), is only important in the context of your social situation.  Move to somewhere in the world where your checking account means nothing and see how entitled you are.

Look: The feelings you feel, the thoughts you have, the individuality you believe to be your own... it's all be done before, probably by someone who has done it better.  There is always someone better.

You are pretend.  You're not important.  Your opinions and beliefs are not your own, they are either wholly regurgitated or a conglomerate of borrowed theories.  You are a machine built by the generation before you, and they the generation before them.

You are flawed, you are human.

So what the fuck are you trying so hard to fucking prove...

...it's almost one of those nights.

...but it's not.

I never have anything interesting to say, anyway.

Maybe this is what growing up is, realizing that you have to fake maturity when the right people are looking.  Trying to work hard enough, maybe get lucky enough, to get what you really want.

Money and power, love and sex.  Shiny toys and fast cars.  The best haircut and most friends...

Life seems to be one, long attempt to get high off of whatever your chosen social-poison.

I sometimes see people of different economic upbringings, different family experiences, different geographical origins, different skin colors, genders... and I get a little upset, knowing that I can never know what it's like to have that certain set of attributes like that which they have... that I can never really understand the world in the way they can.

I suppose it boils down to being upset that I only get to live once, in this way, through these eyes.  How is a person supposed to be the best person they can be if they only get one shot and more specifically, one given life of a certain type of experience, to "do it right"?

But then, I think...
Not enough people look up at the stars and realize how stupid this all is.

每个人。 我们都得爱。

Stop living your life in this soulless way, painstakingly manufacturing circumstances so you have some grand story to tell... The fucking stories write themselves.

It's not a small world at all.
It's a huge world.

...We're just all, in a very real sense, family.

I'm offended that most people don't live by "Everything in Moderation", and even more offended by those who do, but forget about the first word in the phrase:  "Everything in Moderation."

Life isn't about fulfilling every whim and desire.
It's about fulfilling the ones you want to fulfill most.


Relativism isn't philosophy, it's the only sociological understanding of cultures, groups, and individual feelings that coincides with evolutionary theory.


There are very few absolutes in the world.

Don't you get it?

Your tastes, preferences... the things you inherently like, the things you don't...
These are all genetic.  You don't have a choice.  It is the very foundation on which we interact with each other, and all we are are victims of circumstance.

Society is an accident.
Free will is an illusion.
Fate exists as our natural boundaries.

Bliss through ignorance doesn't suit you.  ...or maybe it does.

Maybe our psyche are really that fragile.  Perhaps some more fragile than others.

..."Curiosity" is not a feeling on its own, "curiosity" is a feeling derived from other feelings that you can't quite place.  The things you do "out of curiosity" are the things you do to decide something...  To make up your mind on how you feel or how you plan to react in a certain, given situation.  "Curiosity"... is a state of wanting to find more information to get the upper-hand, whether over someone else, life in general, or even oneself.

A gentle, sad smile and a sorry, sideways glance is my reaction to the growing numbers from specific locations.

I'm wrong a lot, but it always humors me when I'm right.

your security is a blanket that smothers your flames.

...hope it's worth it.

... I wonder if life would be any different if I had chosen the scared puppy instead of the overly friendly puppy when my mother and I, six years old, answered an ad for free puppies.